Pay it Forward

I just had to repost this beautiful, thoughtful list that Anne Marie at Brunch at Saks blogged about. She started her own list of little, simple things that we can do for others to change the direction of someone's day.

"Whether you spend $5 on someone else, or you simply smile to lift the spirit of others- committing a random act of kindness is truly a way to serve from the depth of your heart." - Brunch at Saks

Brunch at Saks 'Pay It Forward' List:

• Hand write a note to a friend or relative and put in the mail.
• Bring a meal to a neighbor or friend when they are sick.
• Spend an hour playing games with the residents of your local convalescent hospital.
• Pay for the person behind you in a fast food line.
• Mow your neighbor's lawn or pull weeds out of their planters.
  
• Bring a pile of old magazines to a doctors office or hospital for their waiting room.
• Take unwanted clothing items to a shelter or goodwill.
• Tape the exact change for a soda or snack to a vending machine.
• Leave a couple pieces of candy on a coworkers desk with a note.
• Pay for the person behind you at a toll booth.
• Call a family member or friend on the day of a test or other important event and tell them you're thinking of them. (No text messages, IM's, Facebook comments, etc! An actual call so they can hear your voice)
• Offer to babysit for friends or family so they can enjoy a night out.
• Draw colorful pictures and bring them to a local hospital for patients' windows.
• Leave behind your finished magazine or book on a plane or bus.
• Make an extra sandwich and snack bag for a homeless person.
• Start off by telling a customer service agent "I know this problem is not your fault." We so often blame them, which is unfair and must be very stressful.
• Return a shopping cart to the front of the store.
• Write a note with an encouraging thought to someone special and put it in their lunch bag or coat pocket for them to find.
• And finally, when all else fails, simply open the door for someone behind you and leave them with a smile.

I'm sure many of us have done some of these random acts. Do you have any to add to her list?

photo credit: *Deline

Giving Credit Where Credit is Due

photo: beBo

Why the random photo of a pretty staircase? Because I wanted to blog about it, but can't seem to find out who the photographer is...

Which brings me to my point. Let me preface this by saying, I'm not the "blogger police," but just wanted to post a little blogger etiquette.

I first discovered this staircase photo on We Heart It.

which led me to Tumblr, Would You Like to Swing on a Star,

which led me to The Life is a Rose,

which led me to princess-queen-v. Then nothing.

That's right. No photo credit for this lovely image.

So, what to do?

• There are all sorts of legal and copyright rules for the internet. Some of which you can read about here on this informative post.

• How many times have you read a blog with numerous images and there are absolutely no image or link credits? Frustrating? Very. I frequently find something I'd like to view or purchase with no trace of where the image originated from.
  

• When you post images that you do not own, you should always credit the photographer if you possibly can. It is their art, not yours. You should also credit the source of the information (where you found it), and any sources that they have named. So, if you found the image on another blog or website, at least credit them with a link back to their site/blog. It's only fair.
  

• An interesting quote...“Tumblr is the place where copyrights and credits go to die.” - Door Sixteen
  

• I know we bloggers frequently stumble upon random images on the internet with no credits at all. What to do then? I'm not really sure how to answer that one. Perhaps do a little more research. At the very least, make an effort to try and find the credit for it.
  

I realize that there is no way to control the vast world of the internet. It's like the Wild West. But, it sure would be nice if we try and give credit to people's images when we can. If I was a photographer, I'd certainly watermark my images!

I hope I don't sound "preachy" as I'm definitely not the authority of the blogging world. Just wanted to share some thoughts.

Other bloggers and photographers, do you have any tips to share on image etiquette or guidelines for usage?

Thank you and Dungeness Crab...

It's been one of those dreary days outside, putting me into one of those "deep thinking" modes. I think you can relate to this kind of day. The kind when something is just gnawing at you.

I was pondering...what is happening to the Art of Gratitude? The lost art of letter writing? If a gift is given, or a kind act is bestowed, isn't it important to recognize the thoughtfulness of the giver with a short note of appreciation, or at the very least, a phone call or email?


One of my favorite stories is about a family friend, (let's call her "Mildred"), sending fresh Dungeness crab every year to some members of my family back east (let's call them "the Smiths"). Every year it was the same, Mildred sent the box of fresh crab and never received a thank you or acknowledgment from the Smiths. Year after year Mildred wondered if the Smiths had received the crab. When finally asked by another family member, Mrs. Smith replied, "If someone gives something with the expectation of a thank you, they shouldn't give it. I just don't have the time to reply. We have such a busy life." Well, I hope you know how the story ends. Mildred never sent the crab again.

Perhaps I'm from an older generation that were taught since childhood to send thank you notes for gifts we received, or call someone to thank them for the dinner party we attended the previous night. I still think it's the right thing to do. It only takes a moment. And, how many times do we get disappointed when someone doesn't acknowledge something we've done, even though we're not doing it to get something back in return?

Okay, I'll get off of my soap box now. Promise. Let me sign off by giving you a BIG THANK YOU for reading my blog, leaving comments when I may not have time to reciprocate (I hope I'm not sounding like Mrs. Smith), and sharing your stories. I'm already starting to feel brighter!

Have a great weekend!

photo credit 1. Darwin Bell, 2. Taste SF

Etiquette: Your Comments!

I thought it would be fun to share some of your comments from the Etiquette Giveaway. The things that were most important to you were handwritten notes & letters, cell phone manners and, surprisingly, men being gentleman. Here are some of your comments:

Handwritten Notes & Letters, including RSVP's:

I'd like to see more people honoring the concept of RSVP when it comes to invitations to events and parties. It's amazing to me how people won't let people know whether or not they're coming to an event and the either don't show up or they come with extra people in tow.
-Sabrina

THANK YOU notes!!! Sometimes people don't write thank you notes immediately after a gift is received and that bugs me! It takes 2 mins people, and I for one look forward to hearing what a person thinks about a gift I took the time to pick out. -Lauren

I would like to see letters being sent in the mail again. With the technology that is at our finger tips today, there has been a decrease in romance and communication. Cell phones, text messages, email...they are so impersonal. Writing letters is an art and is beautiful. -JZ

I must say one thing in particular that I am a stickler for is written thank yous. To receive a handwritten note of gratitude is a dying art. E-mails just don't cut it. And people that cannot even acknowledge receipt of a gift that a person took their time, effort, thought and money to get are just lame. -DolceDreams

I would love it if people would kindly send a short but sweet thank you note after they receive a gift. Sometimes I don't even know if they received it as they never acknowledge it. -Casie Rachele

True Gentlemen

I would love if a man stood up when a lady was leaving the table and coming back to the table. I always love how classy that looks in movies, it gives such respect! -Fabbrunette

What happened to men opening the doors for women? I have gone into stores and had the door hit me in the face because the man in front of me didn't bother to hold the door open. men don't seem to respect their ladies like they used too! There are a few good men who still do this for women and when I see it I cry! -Carla

I particularly wish men wore hats and suits everyday. I love men in hats! And I'm not talking about baseball hats! When I go to the office, I want to see the polished look of a man in a suit and hat, not a man in shorts and a t-shirt. But if I could weave this into an issue of etiquette, I wish men would wear hats and tip them like they used to! -DesertChildAZ

The men now maybe debonair and suave, but it isn't the way we are thinking. Go back to the era of where men were true gentlemen. Car door opened for you, chairs pulled away for you to sit down, and men would stand up as you left and came back to the table. -Mikela

Cell Phone Usage

I wish folks would curb their cell phone usage in public -- waiting rooms, grocery checkout, restaurants, etc.) How often I see someone checking out at the store, talking on the phone the ENTIRE TIME -- so rude to the cashier, as if she/he does not even exist. -The Beautiful Life

Nothing is ruder than a fellow diner talking on the phone when you are eating. -NewlywedHostess

I would like to see people put down their blackberries while attending meetings or just having a conversation with another person. -Bonjour Madame

Dressing

Dressing for the occasion~~it shows respect for others and ones self. -The Red Velvet Shoe

I love the idea of getting dressed to go to the bank or on a flight. -Paris Atelier

General Acts of Kindness

Please, thank-yous, and a general air of politeness - that would be a great place to start! -Eme

Respect always older people like our grandparents or simply people who you know have lived a lot more than you. -Ana

Opening the doors for others , or holding the door open for those behind you so that it does not shut on their person would be so nice. I think the very practice just honors a concept that "I see you are there, and I value you as a human being," which is so very lost today in almost every etiquette transgression there is going. -Karos

I miss neighborhoods that had a real sense of community ... where neighbors at least said "hello" on the street. Remember when we could go and borrow a cup of sugar from each other?
-Lisa Golightly

I'd love it if we would take a moment and acknowledge everyone we come into contact with. How awesome our days could be if we looked people in the eyes, took a breath, and spread some kindness around. -Frenchee le Trip

Thanks again everyone!!

ETIQUETTE... Giveaway!

Awhile ago I did a post called, "Let's Bring Back." Several of you commented about etiquette and good manners, ie; opening the door for people, giving up your seat for an elderly person, and being neighborly. I thought it would be fun to have a giveaway about etiquette.

Here is how the giveaway works:

Starting today, you simply enter by leaving a comment about what customs, manners or traditions you'd like to bring back or change.

Limited to one entry per person. Help me spread the news about the giveaway by mentioning it on your own blog and you'll get a second chance to enter. Simply enter a second comment alerting me of the mention.

See the prizes below...

FIRST PRIZE: But of course, two vintage books on etiquette. One is titled, Book of Etiquette, copyright 1921. This book covers everything from entertaining, house servants and tipping, to travel and hotel etiquette. The second book is titled, Good Manners, copyright 1934. This covers young people who wish to be correct, as well as polite!

SECOND PRIZE: What is etiquette without the lost art of letter writing? This winner receives a G. Lalo writing tablet with matching envelopes. G. Lalo, the Parisian social stationery manufacturer since 1919, provides the royal courts of Europe with handcrafted stationery. Two aspects of G. Lalo stationery contribute to its fame: the quality of its papers and the elegance of its presentation.

The entries can be made until Wednesday, May 13th at 9:00 pm PST. The winners will be picked via Random.org on Thursday, May 14th, and announced on this blog. I will contact the winners for your mailing addresses. Please provide a valid e-mail address or link to one.

{I'll start with my comment here...hope I don't offend any of you .... Let's have cell phones not allowed in restaurants or shops. I am so tired of having a meal out, only to have the person seated next to me speaking loudly on their phone about their date last night. Please people, step outside of the restaurant, shop or post office!}

Can't wait to hear your comments! Good luck!


The giveaway is now closed. Thanks for your comments. Results tomorrow!